MORE OR LESS

2:21 AM Pia San Felipe 0 Comments

I was hoping we could be more but it turns out there's only just enough or worse, less.

I have said before that you're my idea of more that you are what my hearts and flowers consists of. Maybe you are but maybe you're not. I would like to believe every word you say, hang on to your every sentence but I can't. I just can't. Because I'm afraid, too afraid to get hurt for the same reason twice. I've said that I have had enough of the same stupid bullshit; falling for a person and crashing through the pavement because they didn't catch you. I guess that's how it really is supposed to be for me, falling and getting hurt all over again. I lay awake last night not minding the throbbing pain in my head because of all the alcohol I have just consumed but it gave me a realization. Falling for you isn't the root of this fear, it is knowing that you may not reciprocate the feeling that holds me back; it's all my fears realized. As much as I tried to hold this feeling back, to keep myself from falling off the cliff, I can't and that's what made the impact harder, that's what made it painful.

With the situation we are in, it's either we could be more or less because I know just enough is not enough. Oh man, when will my tear ducts stop producing too much tears. This is so exhausting.

[UPDATE 6/11/2015: LOL x 1000000]

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